creation #4 : her swing

            She sat on the swing, the wind gently caressing her face.  Her long blonde hair was a mess, but she never realized.  She was lost in deep thought, as her eyes started to fill up in tears, vision blurred.  She couldn’t help but think back to that night; the night when her pretty perfect life turned upside down, the night she learned the horrible truth, the night she lost everything. 

She was tired.  Tired of how the people around her treated her; tired of trying to live up to expectations; tired of living in fear; tired of living a life for others and never for herself; tired of bottling up all the emotions and pain inside her.  Finally, as if a sign of defeat, tears started to trickle down her cheeks.  She just sat there, wind in her hair, tears streaming down her face.  She didn’t understand why, and how; that while all the other people her age were out there enjoying their lives at the peak, she was here, lost and wandering around helplessly in the deep valley of despair, not knowing where she was going. 

            Suddenly, she heard a voice calling her name.  She lifted up her face and looked around, expecting to see someone walking towards her, but her eyes found no one.  She cried even harder.  Who was she, to think that there might actually be someone who cared enough about her to come all the way out here just to make sure she’s okay?  She blamed herself for her foolishness, for actually hoping that someone might come for her.  Why else did she come all the way out here, away from the people and the hectic life in the city anyway?  She wanted to be alone, to be deserted, and just to be far away from all that was familiar to her.

 Now that she had started to cry, the tears just wouldn’t stop.   She could no longer hold back everything she had been holding in for her whole life.  She cried and cried; a devastating story behind every tear.  All she wanted to was just to cry her heart dry, cry out every single drop of blood her crushed heart contained, cry out every single wave of emotion that ever existed in her heart, cry out every single ray of hope; she wanted to cry her heart empty.  It hurt her, so much; but it felt so good, to finally be able to let all that out, after all those years.  She knew it was her only chance to let go of herself, and she didn’t even bother to stop.  She started to regret coming out here alone; she was craving for human closeness, a pat on her shoulder, a friendly embrace, someone to tell her that everything was alright, even if it was just a plain lie; but she desperately needed that.

The sun was setting.  Shadows grew longer and darker by the minute.  Her phone rang.  It was an alarm clock.  6.45, her phone read.  Darn it was late.  She willed herself to stop, willed those tears to dry.  She steadied herself, clearing up her thoughts once again.  How silly of her to have cried so much just now, she thought, mocking herself silently.  She took out a brush and combed her hair into a high ponytail; a tissue whipped out from her bag to wipe away any trace of a breakdown there was on her face.  She sat back on the swing, swaying there in the dark.  19^th February, a day spent alone on a swing, what a great day.  She smiled to herself, trying to forget about everything that happened earlier.  She put on her armour of smiles again, bottled all those emotions back.  Then she stood up and looked at the swing for one last time.  She wouldn’t be here anytime soon she guessed.  So she went over to the bushes and plucked a bunch of daffodils and put it on the swing.  Stay here for me, she whispered to the flowers, stay here until the next time I come back, please.  And with that, she left.

“But I know you’re just gonna go off with the wind and forget about me, you silly little flowers; just like everyone else in my life did to me.  Oh well, what did I expect from a bunch of flowers?”  She smirked, and pulled out her phone.  She called her dad and came up with an excuse for her disappearance that day, as she started to make her way home.  Everything else was hidden away deep inside her.  No one would ever know what happened that day, absolutely no one.

                            ❄         ❄         ❄         ❄         ❄

A short story written based on a novel I recently read, and it was obviously meant to be shared with all. :) Comments are very much appreciated, and if you would, click into this link (http://www.wattpad.com/22647700-her-swing#.Uhc6-tJyDi8) and give me a vote. Thanks! ;)


. with love from .
thememoryholder

creation #2 : dark blue eyes

"ARE YOU OKAY?"

Dark blue eyes,
Looking straight into mine.
What happened to me,
He had no clue.

The feelings came to me,
Insecurities arising;
Lost control over all emotions,
As the urge to weep finally hit.

Vision blurred, teary view,
Eyes welled up in despair;
Then she walked in, called your name,
You walked to her and left me there.

I stole a glance,
Caught my breath,
Held back my tears,
And turned away.

Those eyes,
Knocked down walls of insincerity,
Triggered the rush of tears.

Dark blue eyes,
I shall never trust again.

. with love from .
thememoryholder

memory #12 : they will exist

But in a box beneath my bed is a letter that you never read from three summers back,
It's hard not to find it all a little bitter sweet,
And lookin' back on all of that it's nice to believe;

It's been you all along.


And these are the things I will never ever tell you, you will never ever know, you will never ever hear coming out from me.
Yet, they will exist; forever and always.

Still, it's time to finally let go.  :)



. with love from .
thememoryholder

memory #11 : 逃避一个我不想要的答案

三年。

这三年以来，一直都在逃避的事实；

这三年以来，一直都不敢问的问题；

这三年以来，一直都在等待的答案。

今天，我终于得到了。

三年以来，
虽然很想听到答案，
却不想知道答案；
虽然恨不得亲口问出答案，
却从来都不过问。

现在，我得到答案了，
可是，这时我想要的吗？

三年来，
从来不过问，
是因为我一直都在逃避，
逃避一个我不想要的答案。

好想再回到那些年的时光，回到教室座位前后，故意讨你温柔的骂。- 那些年，胡夏

. with love from .
thememoryholder

memory #8 : shattered piece trust

I hate people who misuse my trust,

Especially those I trusted the most.

Why do I always trust the wrong people?

It used to be her,
Then him,
Now you.

I thought you were different.
Oh well, you seemed different.
But then, you started to change,
And since then, things have never been the same.

I freaking hate changes.

Why can't things just stay the same?
Putting a knot to the ends of two strings in one week?
That's tough.

I feel like I'm just letting the people I love,
The people I care about,
Slowly slip through my fingers.

The people I would never ever wanna hurt,
They're hurt by my secrets;

The people I used to care for,

They're leaving me, one by one.

Believe me, I'm trying my best;
I'm trying everything in my power to save everything.
But sometimes, it's not by our choice.
If things are to break, it'll break.

Too many people have come and left,
Too many wounds imprinted by those I cared;

Too may words left misunderstood,

Too many secrets, waiting to be uncovered.

The trust I had in you,

Misused,
Shattered.

Now you've shattered it,
Leave, once and for all.

And please, never ever come back to me again.
Cause all it takes is just a smile from you,
To break down all the boundaries I built.

Leave,
And never look back.

I've found time, can heal almost anything.  - Taylor Swift, Fifteen.

Oh well, looks like she was wrong.

. with love from .

thememoryholder

memory #6 : here it ends

Looking at your name,
Saying it again;

The awkward feeling arises,

And takes over my conscience.

The talks we used to have,

All gone, like a head shaved;

Those wonderful moments,

All gone in an instant.

I remember all your secrets;
And just how you laughed.

But what about my secrets?
Do you remember, at all?

I guess it's forgotten,
All blown away;
By the storm that settled,
On the day we went our ways.

I've accepted the truth,

That you've gone far away;

Nothing I could do would make you stay,

You still wanted to leave anyway.

So here I sit,
With my heart in the pit,

Knowing this is it,

Here it ends.

. with love from .

thememoryholder